Intrepid Girl Reporter

As a person who has never let actual constraints affect her imaginative powers, I’m often disappointed when I finally see pictures of the people I’ve imagined. Usually this applies to artists, as I don’t have a lot of other occasions to sit around and contemplate what people I don’t know look like. I love Mirah, for example, and Carla Bruni, but for whatever reason the image I had of them in my head simply doesn’t jive with what actually exists. Which isn’t to criticize them, of course; one can only change the way one looks to a certain extent, and the fact that Ms. Bruni isn’t exactly as ethereal and sad-looking as I might have thought doesn’t really mean that what she creates is any less valid. But still, I’m not going to deny a little bit of a letdown.

Perversely, however, Ira Glass is exactly as attractive as I pictured - maybe even a little bit more so - and that’s rather disappointing, too.

Figure 1: It’s a montage. (Or as close as I can get with WordPress.)

Part of me hates the fact that I love This American Life, the show so infamously described by one Summer Roberts as

…that show by those hipster know-it-alls who talk about how fascinating ordinary people are. Gawd.

There are times when I think the show would be perfect if it could just dump Jack Hitt and Sarah Vowell, two of the biggest perpetrators of the patronizing, ludicrously biased, unable-to-see-past-its-own-navel tone to which TAL sometimes falls victim. (Also, I hate hate HATE Sarah Vowell’s voice.) And then, of course, there are other times when it messes up all on its own.

Nonetheless, I love stories, and I love the idea of telling stories, and I respect the fact that - to a certain degree - the show tries to capture a wide range of stories in America. And I like the show, in general, period. It makes me laugh, and it’s interesting.

Still, though, it’s so cliche to be in love with Ira Glass. Couldn’t I have found someone less sort of isolated? Someone less likely to fall victim to all the accusations leveled at this demographic?

What I really want, I think, is to not want this. Because he does look exactly as I imagined, and I still like him.

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I have a lot of quality student material to share and a lot to say about Japan, the reason for my extended hiatus, but not right now, which means probably never. Keep your fingers crossed if you like.

Heads up:  I’ll be in A City for A Conference with the Program for the next few days; I’m bringing my laptop so that Oregon (formerly E) can get some music and so that I can maybe connect to the Internet, depending, even though some time away from a computer would probably be a good thing. Point being that I might be MIA for a few days, not that anyone checks this every day anyway, but if you do: a) I won’t be here and b) really?

I should have mentioned in my post re: the hood rats who are my students the other day that I was spontaneously serenaded the other day by four students who were late to class. They were in 1J, of course. I do have other classes, really, and many of them are colorful and smart and funny, but it is gratifying to know that this class feels the same way about me as I do about them. And I think they do, and I think that’s why, when I made them apologize for being late, they broke out into this FT Island song, the chorus of which is “I’m sorry but I love you.” Then this kid with pink glasses and weird fifties hair came up, got on one knee, and said, “(IGR). 사랑헤요.”  Which means “I love you.”

The wind has started back on Jeju-do, and I am very happy to be able to wear long-sleeved things and not be gross and sweaty.

So the price for my getting to spend time with the only cute teacher at my school (also, the only male teacher under fifty) this morning was a nasty-looking rock on the floor of my classroom, where it had landed after having been hurled through one of the windows at the end of the room. Vice Principal and Cute Teacher helped me sweep up the fragments of glass littering the floor - although there wasn’t a lot to talk about, given my complete absence of Korean skills - and then I was consigned to Pseudo Co-Teacher’s room next door until the whole thing got fixed. The whole thing is more than a little unnerving, although at least I know that it’s probably not personal; Actual Co-Teacher has assured me that the same thing happened twice last semester. Sweet. I was a little afraid that it was some student who was disgruntled over having not won a Choco Pie. Or maybe someone protesting against Kentucky Fried Chicken, or hapas, or people who can’t speak Korean. So many possibilities, really.

Every few months or so I forget exactly how in love I am with “Baba O’Riley,” so I listened to it on the way to school as I caught some third graders hanging out in Family Mart, and then I used it again as my signal for the kids to come into PCT’s room instead of mine. Which was the only upshot of the whole situation, I guess, because really I was just playing it to see if I could.

Other day highlights:

STUDENT RESPONSES TO THE PROMPT, “DESCRIBE JEJU-DO”

• many cars
• many beautiful girls
• many handsome boys
• exciting stones
• oranges

STUDENT RESPONSES TO THE QUESTION, “WHAT HAPPENS IF THE NOISE-O-METER GETS TO FIVE?” (correct answer: no talking for the rest of the period)

• “You hit”
• “We die”
• “You very angry”

As untrue as all those are (well, maybe not the last one), as much as I would like to sing that I don’t need to be forgiven…I made one kid in my last class, 2K, stay behind once the bell had rung. I actually know him pretty well, which is to say that I can remember his name; we’ve hung out after lunch a good bit. He’s tiny and mouthy and funny and he speaks English pretty well, but he seriously will not stop being disruptive and talking - which I can understand, having been more or less the same kid in some ways, but still. So I had my standard “you-are-smart-why-are-you-doing-this” talk with him, after which I released him into the care of his other English teacher, who then proceeded to corner him in the hall and hit him repeatedly with a book. And this is a teacher that I like.

PS. It’s not his best, but I’m still in love with David Sedaris.